Tuesday, January 13, 2009

How To Beat The Classroom Blues


True ladies are never inattentive in class. But if you've heard the lesson a million times, and simply can't stand it any longer, here's how to get away with not listening.
  1. If you're on a computer, know how to close windows quickly and discreetly before opening any. Set your volume to mute, especially while surfing the net.
  2. If you're writing notes, get ready for a quick page-flip.
  3. Nod in agreement from time to time.
  4. Do. Not. Text. In. Class. Save it for later, this is very very rude.
  5. Never, ever place a telephone call in class! It's just outrageous.
  6. Establish eye contact with your professor/teacher and smile knowingly.
  7. If you're called upon to answer a question and you really haven't been listening, don't try to cover it up. You're about to get caught red-handed. Do not, however, admit defeat outright. Ask politely for your teacher to repeat themselves, as you seem to have missed the last part of what they said.
  8. Whether you're on a computer or making written notes, keep something related to your class nearby as a cover-up.
  9. When all else fails and a scolding is close-at-hand, pull a tissue from your handbag and run dramatically to the salle de bain- you're a girl, you'll get away with it.

Whenever possible, try to actually pay attention. Any lady worth her weight in leather-bound books will have a vast knowledge of many subjects that will come in handy in future conversations. Plus, teachers are people too. They deserve your respect and attention. A professional relationship with a teacher is one of the most valuable you'll ever have. Try not to ruin it.

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